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For those of you considering a trip to El Potrero Chico (and really, why haven’t you just bought your tickets already???), here is a list of MUST DO’s while you are down there!

First and foremost put together an awesome crew. Make sure they are awesome and aren’t just faking it. You can assure this by packing all of them into a small sedan and going for a literal test drive. Yes, someone will need to be in the trunk. Don’t worry, it’s Mexico. It’ll all work out.

Rent a car. Be aware the bumper might come off when you drive over los topes grandes (the giant speed bumps). This will be uncomfortable for the person in the trunk. Feed them beer. They’ll get over it.

Use the car to drive to the store in Hildalgo (5 mins from La Posada, where you should stay). At the store, buy cans of beer. They will put it in a bag with ice for you. Try not to spill ice all over the trunk.

Enjoy the beer around a campfire with lots of other climbering folk from around the globe. Enjoy the standard conversation: Where are you from? How long are you here for? What are you climbing/what have you climbed?

Wake up and go Climbing. Make a sweet “backpack” out of the climbing rope, and take care not to trip on it because you are short and you did a poor job of flaking the rope to an appropriate length.

Take the car into town again for more beer (you’re climbers, of course you already ran out). Purchase muchas Caguamas!

….enjoy una Caguama in the car. It’s Mexico, it’s legal. But remember, safety first!

While you’re at it, pick up some Animalitos as well! They go great with caguamas, AND it’s just a fun word to say. Seriously, say it. “Animalitoooooos!!!!” Try not to smile. Yeah, that’s what I thought.

Go climbing some more in the Virgin Canyon. Take artistic photos so you can feel cool later.

You’re hungry. Head back into town and eat hamburguesa gigante. It will cost $4 and you will have to split it with someone.

Head back to camp to play with your Action Figure Mascot. He’s feeling rejected. Extra style points for rocking sweet shades inside.

Make sure you recycle. Think of the sad little baby birdies.

Enjoy one more day of climbing. Take in the scenery. Check out unusual insects (stick bugs). Don’t touch the purple centipedes. They can literally kill you.

Enjoy a final trip into town to hit up the Bebidas stand (this is not your first time here, so you know to order a Tequila SuNrise, not a Tequila Surise).

Stand in line forever waiting for your EXTRA LARGE Margarita to go. You will think it’s the best thing you’ve ever imbibed in your life. For $2.50, it will be.

Take a ridiculous picture. In fact, take a whole bunch of them.

By the way, this advice pretty much goes for any trip. Happy Travels friends!