In this article, originally written for Mountaineer magazine, I got to talk about poop and advise readers of the best places to sit back (on the pot), relax, and enjoy the priviest views in Washington.
When you’re sourcing content for a story about outdoor toilets, your first thought probably isn’t, “I’m going to make my mom so proud.” Well, your mom isn’t a copy editor for this magazine, but my mom is, and when I told her about this article, the first thing she did was groan and say, “Oh Kristina. You aren’t writing about poop again, are you?” Full of unconditional love, she did a quick course correction. “It has been about a year since you wrote about poop, so I guess this makes sense.”
What can I say? I am completely regular. By which, of course, I mean that I have always loved good bathroom humor. Research would suggest I am not alone. When we posted asking for submissions for this article, more than a hundred people shared photos and stories from encounters of the brown kind. A loo with a view, or poo with a view, seems to be the uniting topic everyone on the internet was looking for.
Appeal of Outdoor Thunder Buckets
Outdoor toilets, aka backcountry or alpine privies, come in all shapes and sizes (and smells). Despite their variability, these commodes seem to be universally loved. Where else can you make uninterrupted eye contact with a marmot – or in scary cases, a mountain goat – while answering the call of nature? Contend with wind or snow or lightning while avoiding splinters from a wooden toilet seat? Confront the dangers of mosquito bites and sunburns in sensitive areas at the same time?
Whether you’ve been looking forward to the potty break for five hours or five minutes, there’s nothing quite like the feeling of throwing off your heavy pack, sitting down, and letting it all go. Plus, if you poop in a hole, you aren’t carrying that baggage out with you. These thrones offer a literal lightening of the load, if you will.
Classic Craps of the PNW
For this article, we were looking specifically for the best – or priviest – views from outdoor toilets in Washington. (One commenter noted that any privy can be an alpine privy if you leave the door open, which is absolutely correct.) Nominations flowed in from across Washington state. We saw cliffside, water side, and mountain side options. Folks also shared a few back-to-back – or crap-to-crap – options. It seems that even backcountry rangers think that outdoor pooping is better with friends.
The installers of the Lake Serene privy would agree. “The toilet at Lake Serene has a decent view, but the fun part is that it’s slightly elevated with no tall vegetation between you and the trail,” said outdoor powder room user Christopher Blodgett. “You go into the woods thinking it’s private, and once you’re settled in, people walking down the trail are in full view and at eye level with the toilet. The toilet faces the trail, so if anyone happens to turn their head, it’s an awkward staring contest.”
The bottom line: we saw a lot of crap for this article, but our committee of dedicated staff poopers couldn’t pick a favorite. And why should we? All of the nominated crappers rate well above a 10 and offer their own special adventure. From Lake Chelan to the Wonderland Trail to Gothic Basin, we loved all your stories and the memorable trips they represent. Each one is unique, and from what we hear, well worth the visit.
Personally, I’m excited to share that after perusing all of the incredible privy views, I have a new type of bucket list. That’s right. I went there. My mom will be so proud.
Want more articles like this? Check out my list of external publications for all the sass you could ever need.
